Today I want to call your best friend and tell her (or him) why she is your best friend.
You should spend a little time thinking about this before you call, maybe even make a list (I love a good list). Why is she your best friend over all other friends? What is it about your relationship that elevated it to the next level?
It might be awkward if you call and say “I am supposed to tell you why you’re my best friend.” Don’t do that – don’t be weird. Just work those things you’ve identified into your conversation.
For instance, I love my best friend because of her compassion; she has such a big heart and does so much for everyone else. When I talk to her, I will use the conversation as a guide, but try to find a way to let her know how much I value that trait in her.
This year on her birthday I tried to find the perfect birthday card for her, but couldn’t narrow it down. So I bought them all. I had a stack of cards, and in each one I told her one reason why I love her. Then I hid them all around her house, so she spent the day finding them. In five years, which do you think she’ll remember, the gift I bought or the cards? Sharing your words with someone is the most important gift you can give.
Your relationship with your best friend is one that you should work to maintain as much as a marriage. No matter where you are in life, you will need your friend’s support and love and advice. Don’t let this relationship fall by the wayside. In 2009 I moved across the country for work; I left one month before my best friend had her first baby. It killed me to not be there every day to help her figure the mom thing out and just be a part of her life in the way that I was used to. We had to adapt to the situation. We sent each other cards and had flowers delivered on birthdays. The company allowed me to fly home once a month, and I took advantage of that, even in the winter months where I dealt with a flight delay or cancellation every single time. It was hard on me, but it was also important to me, so I made it work.
You can’t always be absent from a relationship and use the excuse that life got in the way. Whatever your situation, you have to be there for the important things at the very least. I was there when the baby was born (she actually scheduled the inducement for when I would be in town – what a friend!). That was a moment I wasn’t willing to miss, whatever it took. Your actions will tell a person how much they mean to you, even more than your words can. If you care about someone, be present in their life.